Monday, March 30, 2015

Click click boom

That sounds like how I work. I click click and then get bored and it's boom. Happens too often.

In other news, homemade facials are an interesting concept. Who knew all I needed was honey, sugar and lime juice? I've made the mixture, but the final demo is in progress and the results are pending. Questions of "what, where do I put this? How long for? Is it supposed to be this drippy?" take over my time for now. I have a very interesting life. You bet.

So the past two months have been spent in hibernation. Literally. Okay not totally but almost. The idea of spending time at home with Netflix and a box of Nutella is so much more exciting than a night painting the town red, or green, or blue..or..yellow..

Why, you ask? Maybe because right now, I don't know what I want from life. That's a big confession there. But it can't be any truer. Everyday I ask myself, what do I really want? What motivates me beyond my own control to get up and move?

I have a lot already. But the never ending search of human desires that are not in our current possession drive the great to become greater.

No matter how long I spend pondering over the question of what I'm searching for, I don't seem to come up with an answer that's up to my perfectionist standards. Is it wrong to want, and I kid you not, everything! from life?

Money, time, love, purpose, affection, travel, some more no order of preference..just a want for it all, at the same time..

And maybe that's where it's all stemming from. That lack of being able to figure out - how can I have everything I want? And is everything really what I want?

There's a predictable plan that's been laid out for me. The one that stays on the path of no risks. The conventional way of doing things. But what ELSE can be done? What more is there?

Lol I should do a count for the number of question marks on this post. The answers lay hidden away, and in the meantime my jar of Nutella beckons. 

Goodbye, or should I say goodbye?

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